The Barcelona airport on the way to London Stansted airport
How do you like them apples, Ryanair?
As you know, budget airlines like to screw you out of your money in any way they can. But last weekend, good triumphed over evil when I approached the Ryanair desk laden down with three jackets, my “eurobag” & an attitude.
As I waited in line to get my ticket checked, the fun-sucking flight attendant informed me that I would have to make sure my bag was the proper size. In other words, he was under the impression that it wasn’t & was more than happy to charge me 60 euro to put it under the plane. No. Uh-uh. Not happening.
I hauled my bag & load of jackets over to the little bin, looking into it with disdain. It DID look really tiny now that I was hovering over it & I’d filled my bag to capacity like the average girl would. Sweating bullets, I hoisted the bag up & slammed it down into the bin, it’s bottom quarter barely edging past the top. The flight attendant was unimpressed. Even with pushing, my bag’s top half remained marooned. Fearful that if I forced it for too long, the flight attendant would deem it too big, I did the only thing I could do.
I sat on it. HARD. Turning around sharply, I slammed my buttocks onto the top of the bag, sending it sailing into the bottom of the bin with a satisfied crash. Now that I had the entire gate’s attention, I pursed my lips into a smug, satisfied grin, all the while remaining seated on my little throne. “I think that’s fine,” muttered the flight attendant sharply, handing me back my boarding pass. I floated back to my place in line like a goddess, feeling very proud indeed. ”I’ve never seen a girl do that before, that made my day!” said the British man standing in front of me in line. I smiled grandly, reveling in the afterglow of my clever antics. My incessant laughter showed no sign of stopping, even as my face turned redder than a beet. I guess I got a pretty good story out of my very unorthodox, un-American holiday season after all.
So happy holidays, everyone! & may your holidays be as sassy, foolish & utterly unabashed as mine!